Only hope
by honeydew-chan
Summary: A basic Naruto high school fiction with a slight twist. Sasunaru. Yaoi.
1. Prologue

**A/N: Hi, people. Thanks for keeping up with this story, even though I'm seriously a terrible updater. XS For those who are new, I extend my warmest welcome, and I hope you will enjoy your stay. :) Like I've mentioned a couple months back, OH is in the process of its remaking because I was unhappy with the writing. This is an edited version of the story. Same plot, just written differently, and in Naruto's POV by the way (because the focus is mainly on him, I feel it's more appropriate this way). I apologise for my lateness... and have a good read.**

**Warning: This is a yaoi fanfiction. A Sasunaru fiction. Although it's pretty PG in the beginning. With a pinch of angst and maybe a couple of vulgarities in the mix. You have been warned. **

**Disclaimer: Naruto does not belong to me. **

**Prologue**

Dark. That's all I see surrounding me. It doesn't matter whether I have my eyes closed or not, it is the same. It feels the same.

A gush of wind sweeps by and in reflex, I shiver to my last bone, not minding the mud on the floor scraping against flesh as I tug my bent knees closer to my body. It lends little heat but I'm desperate. I'll salvage any attempt. The soaked rags I have for clothes does nothing to shield the wind nor the cold. And by any means of the pitter patter against the zinc roof, the thundering downpour does not sound like it will rest any time sooner.

I try to at least feel some sort of gratitude that in a million chance to one, I have found someplace with a roof, albeit, a rundown one. I would not have last in the harsh weather what with my deteriorating stamina and mindless sprinting. There is still a continuous sting in both my feet, most probably torn and raw from the running. I have long lost my slippers on the way. I will not miss them but they were what I had.

I accidentally lean heavily on the wooden pillar in my shift to get comfortable. It creaks softly but it is enough to startle me. I turn my head in franticness, to the left and right even though it is darkness that greets me. And when I realise it is only myself, I will my rapid heartbeat to slow its dance. It's awful. It's painful. I'm scared, I will not deny, letting the tear I have been holding back roll down a cool cheek. How can I pretend this is all a dream when it feels so real? My lips are trembling, I know. I can feel from the harsh shaking of my entire being, I bet my soul shakes with me.

But what am I to do? _I'm not strong enough, Pa._ A choked sound escapes my mouth and I cover it with my arm. _Ma already left and now, you are gone too. You promised me you will be back. You promised! _

_Why aren't you? Why aren't you??_

_Help me, Pa._

I mouth my silent plea, grabbing my knees tighter. But who am I kidding? He has left for almost half a year now, gone like the sudden gush of wind. As much as I try hating him, I cannot do it. He is still my hero and my heart and conscience betrays my mind. Every time.

I drop my head against my bony knees as if they weigh a tonne, casting aside the many images of a smiling man with bright blue eyes. The mental sight brings an ongoing dull throb in a beginning of a fresh headache. I feel my head steadily getting heavier and myself clawing at the end strings of consciousness. It is a futile act. Only sheer will is keeping me awake but I'm tired, very, very tired. I do not think any normal six years old experience what I do. Maybe, except them?

Distantly, I register a strong hold on my back and around my knees. I feel myself lifted so casually in the air in moments and forcefully open my eyelids. _When did I shut them anyway? _In my partially conscious mind, I cannot care less if it is them. They can have their way, I do not care anymore. I have suffered enough beatings and kicks, what is one more? The strong grip however, confirms that it is not them. This touch is too soft, too warm. It kind of feels like... _Pa. _My heartbeat quickens its pace with a single lingering thought I have deprived myself with.

_Has he come to save me?_

I can barely sketch the outlines of this figure, he's running too quickly and my vision is too clouded. I really am tempted to ask him "What is the hurry?", but my lips can barely move. The last thing I remember, is my body being in contact with the softest cushion I've ever felt before a blanket of nothingness enveloped me. And I am brought to a happy land with two of the people I want to see the most.

---


	2. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

I conclude, the taste of sweet air is pure joy.

Stretching both my arms upwards, I inhale slowly and deeply. My eyelids are tightly shut against the bright sun but the warmth is enough to remind me of its majestic existence. Sweat trickles down my forehead and the collar of the school blouse I'm wearing is sticking to my neck. It is pretty uncomfortable but I'm not complaining. I like the heat and the sun, it gets me hyperactive. I think the sun is God's greatest creation to mankind. Or is it the other way around? _Haha._

I lean on the floor, staring at a blue sky filled with fluffy clouds. One hand is automatically folded backwards for my head to rest on. The other hand, I raise to block part of the sun out. It is Spring but the sun is definitely too bright for my blue eyes. As best as I could, I steer my vision from the source of light and focus instead on the immobile clouds, silently wondering what Shikamaru finds so fascinating about. I blink several times when I still come up with nothing and dismiss it in a short drone. _Damn, what a waste of time. _A yawn blossoms from my lips and I do not bother to stifle it. Etiquette is never one of my best subjects.

With my boredom looming around, I chance a look at the group of girls in the field. It's some distance away but I register a few of them as seniors from the upper class. Not that I have super vision, but anybody can recognise Ten Ten with the double buns on her head. Sometimes, I do wonder if she purposely have that hairstyle because she resembles Chun Li from Street Fighter. Until I have the guts to ask her one day, I guess I'll have to make do with my own thoughts.

I flick my wrist and scan briefly at the digits on my watch, counting the period. It should be the intermission between the second and third period at this time. I will not be having Iruka until the seventh. Normally I would not have cared, but Iruka has given me the warning look, a look that promises bad outcomes, this morning. Now, I do not want to get into his bad mood. He can be worse than a woman. I shiver at an unwanted thought. This is the disadvantage of having a teacher for a guardian. They will get to know of your misbehaves in school firsthand. Everything goes into his ears, sometimes even before I know I'm in trouble. The least I can do for him is attend his class.

Iruka is probably the most important person to me right now. I do have a few good friends, and the school headmistress is in a good enough relationship with me too, but they are different. I can't trust them like I do to Iruka. He is the one I can rely on. He is my family. The day he took me under his wing is the day that changed my life. I was as good as dead. He taught me to breathe. He fed me with confidence and believe when I needed most. I'm still broken, I know, but I'm a million times better than a few years back. And for that, I am glad. I've changed so much. The guy with the same blond hair and blue eyes as Pa is no longer sullen. He's grinning when I look into the mirror.

My lips quirk up in a small smile. It has been ages since I last thought about the past. No longer do I look behind, my place is here, in Konoha, in the present. I will be lying however, if I say I'm always this optimistic. There are times when I caught myself in webs of despair. Those are the times when I'm alone in my room, staring at the far end wall. But I've learn to cope with it. In my younger days, Iruka was the one I turn to and now, I'm strong enough to stand with both my feet.

"UZUMAKI NARUTO!!!!!"

I jump slightly at the loud screech, banging my elbow into the solid floor. I hiss in pain, nursing it with the other hand. My eyes are wide and I cannot stop the thumping heart galloping like a racing horse. The voice is unmistakable, it's Iruka. Quickly, I flick my wrist to look at the time. _Blardy_ _hell, it's only the fifth period._ I am as good as pissed when a sudden thought strikes me.

_Shit. _There is a transition going on with the curriculum, Iruka had told me a week back. They have amended the timetable, I notice belatedly, slapping a palm to a head of yellow.

_Iruka is going to kill me._

_---_

Iruka has been quiet since the ride home. It's... not normal. Usually, he would have started a long story about how important education is in today's world or how my attitude is going to get me expelled. But when I had waited for him at the car after the bell rang, he had simply walked into the driver's seat without as much as a glance. It throws me off guard. I've seen Iruka pissed, angry and upset, I've never seen him this way. Have I gone overboard this time?

"Iruka" I start uncertainly, slicing the thick and unbearable silence. He is unlocking the door to our home when he stops to gaze at me. His lips are closed together in a tight line parallel to the scar across his nose. He waits for me to continue.

"God, Iruka, how much longer are you going to ignore me?" I lash out, threading a hand into spikes of blond. I wonder how people can handle this kind of silent treatment, it's killing me worse than a physical punch. He says nothing for a long time before finally sighing and shakes his head violently in exasperation. Mentally, I thank God above that Iruka is behaving more... Iruka-like.

"Do you know why I'm putting you through school?" he says softly after a moment, brown eyes studying mine. There is no need for thinking, I answer the first thing that comes into my mind.

"To get a good education" I answer as a matter-of-fact, remembering the countless talks about this issue with Iruka. He nods his head and proceeds to turn the knob of the door. He stands at a corner and waits for me to step in before closing the door behind him with a soft bang.

"Yes, and more." he agrees, plopping down at a two seater in the living room. "A school is not a playground, it is a learning ground. It's your stepping stone, your future! You do not only learn the subjects taught, you learn to interact, to take responsibilities for your own actions" His words drive out like a march, not stopping until a command is given.

"I drilled you with lessons above your level early on, because I know you have the potential to be excellent. And now you are throwing every effort you and I made into the drain!" he muses. I frown slightly at his remark, slightly irritated and a hell lot more offended.

It's true. Growing up, I've hated the world for taking everything away from me. I did not trust anybody and wouldn't talk to anyone except Iruka. And so, before Iruka had managed to hammer some sense into me, I had piled myself in books and learnt everything I could. As a teacher, Iruka had supported my enthusiasm and would teach me. It is part this reason I dislike attending classes now. What I learn now, is what I had covered a few years back.

"Hey, at least I'm not expelled!" I try to reason. _I'm not that bad, I'm even getting better than average grades! _He rolls his eyes at me, raising both his hands to choke an imaginary neck in the air.

"Yeah, it's just a matter of time. It's barely the start of the year, and three teachers have complained about your behaviour and multiple truancies." Iruka nearly screams out before adding. "Tsunade is not going to be pleased when she hears about this" I cringe at the mention of the blond headmistress. She can be pretty mean when she wants to be. I do not feel like going into her office this early in the year. Yet.

"Okay, okay, I'll behave, alright. I'll attend all classes tomorrow, happy?" I say in defeat, slumping against a wall. _It's going to be a long day tomorrow. _I grimace at the thought, not looking forward to it at all.

"That's all?" he asks, folding his arms to his chest. I exhale loudly, irritated at being told to do things. _Like as though I'm still a child._

"Fine, for the rest of the week." I utter, although disapprovingly. He is about to voice something else before I cut him off with a sharp retort. "Don't push it" I breathe out with a finger in warning. Iruka sighs again, but this time, he has a small smile on his lips. Deeming the conversation done, I turn my heels and head for my room, pondering on his strange behaviour earlier.

"Oh, yeah. One more thing. Don't think you can get away with skipping my class today" he taunts when I'm halfway into my room. I stop midway and look back at him. _What else does he want now? _I've already promised to sit in for a week of classes, isn't that enough? He looks at me smugly, standing up to get into his own room as well.

"Consider this your punishment. This one week, you can kiss your ramen gooodbye"

"WHAT???" I think I literally feel my heart dropping onto the ground.

---

**A/N: Chapter 2 will be uploaded in a few days' time. I hope you like the edited version. With work and transferring procedures, it has been a little hectic. But I shall resume writing at a faster speed in a few month's time. In a new environment and a different country... Russia. Any idea how that place is? **


	3. Chapter 2

**A/N: Hi, peeps, thanks for reading again. And this is Chapter 2 like I have promised. I hope you have a good read. And I'll work on my Chapter 3 as soon as possible. Thanks for keeping up again. I'll reply to your reviews soon too. **

**Chapter 2**

I find myself standing on a slim road in between two rows of houses. It is strange because I do not recognise this place. Yet, my heart tells me that I've been here before. Once upon a time. I turn around, eyes taking in the swirl of coloured foreign blocks, trying to make sense of this situation. How did I end up here? How come I can't remember anything? It frustrates me because I feel like I'm missing something very important.

I walk down the street with a detached pace, trying to find someone to tell me where I am. _I'm being ignored._ There are people around but they walk pass as though I'm transparent. And I'm hit with a realisation. I am lost, clad only in ordinary school uniform with neither money nor materials. What am I to do? Am I going to be stuck in this strange place forever?

In the midst of calming the growing panic, a pair of father and son catches my eyes. They are walking slowly, hand in hand, slipping in between the dark corners of terrace houses. My legs move before I can stop them. I clench my fists slightly, my eyelids slides down slightly, at the sight of the duo. An indescribable feeling is boiling at the pit of my stomach. I can recognise them. _I know them._ It's Pa and I.

_I'm in a dream_, I realise. And at the beginning of a nightmare I would always carry with me till the day I part from this world.

They stop at the front of a house. And a quick glance to memory lane reminds me that I lived there for that period of time. I shift my foot so that I am facing the older blond's face now, eyes scanning from the top of the long blond spikes to the sharp curve of his chin. I take in the warmth in his bright blue eyes as he stare down at his son, _me. _I take in his small sad smile before my eyes dart to the linked fingers. I slip both my hands into my pockets unconsciously.

Then, I steer my vision to the other me, the younger me. This is me, ten years younger. I looked vaguely different. Sure, he still has the same blob of yellow head and the same bright blue eyes. But the cheeks are puffed up in baby fat and there aren't any traces of scars on his face. He is also many feet shorter. In estimation from my current location, I think he should be standing with a height around my hips. I've never realised I've grown that much.

I wait as they stood there, wondering when I would wake from this dream. It's weird, I've never had a dream so vivid, so clear, so conscious. It is startling. It's new. Half of me wants to get off this memory and the other half is holding back, wanting to salvage the last memory of Pa.

It seems like forever before Pa finally raises his hand. I can see that he is hesitant in his move with the way his fingers keep flexing but he gingerly places an index finger on the doorbell anyway. It buzzes a soft melody I know I'd come to hate in my later life. The door creaks open within moments and a tall lady comes out. Even in a dream, my body trembles at her presence. It is overwhelming.

I could not look at her. I can't bear to do so, therefore, I look into the house instead. There are many kids there, ranging from little toddlers to the early teens. Some are studying by themselves, some are feeding the young, while the others are just chilling in the living room. In the background, a small box of black and white screen television is playing the "Tom and Jerry" show. One quick glance and anybody can deduce that the place is overcrowded with children.

I stare back when Pa kneels down to look at "ten years younger" me in the eye. He embraces him in a strong hug. It takes a hundred per cent effort to wrestle a growing need to run to Pa and hug him. I stay rooted to the ground as his big hands rest on the other me's shoulders firmly. Childishly, I wish that it is me and not "ten years younger" me that his hands are on.

"Be a good boy" I hear him say in a cracked voice. The other me's eyes are welled up in tears but I know he wouldn't cry. I used to believe that crying is a weakness, and it is still something I strongly believe in now. I look on as Pa motions the other me into the house. He looks back as the door closes loudly in one swift bang behind him and I know that it would be the last time he would see his father, _my father_.

---

I spring out of my bed, eyes wide. I am rudely jolted awake from a loud banging. Both my hands are clutching the sheets, as I belatedly notice the comforter resting on the carpeted floor like nobody's business. I take in the pale colours of the walls and the many hanging posters of busty women doing suggestive poses. Slowly, I shut my eyelids again and take in a deep pleasing breath.

_I'm back in my room_. I don't know whether I'm happy or sad about it, it feels bittersweet. But like I have said, those memories belong to the past, and I should let them bury themselves beneath piles of porn and better memories. Yeah, my life is here, in the future. Life doesn't sound so bad after all.

I am about to go back to bed when another loud noise invades my hearing system. This time, it takes the form of humans talking. My ears perk up in alertness. I look to the standing clock on the side table and ironically, it blinks and mutters a soft "". Pushing myself from the bed, I do not bother to put on a T-shirt as I make a quick beeline to the door. Iruka is a very quiet worker, he doesn't make loud movements. The only one that has always make a ruckus is me. Besides, who could be here at this hour? Burglars?

The first thing that registers in my mind upon the arrival at the living room are the many luggage bags alining the wall. And the life size human statue too. That's when the human statue starts to speak...

"Who the hell are you?"

I blink in confusion. Here is one good looking teenager demanding my identity in my house. He is sitting on one of the bags and has both hands folded to his chest of creamy white skin. Midnight black hair covers the top of the head with uneven spikes, more like a duck's butt now that I stare at it longer. An irritated gaze completes the look, making him look like a small kid trying too hard to look old. What is this, soap opera?

"What?" I muster my ugliest look and projects it at him. It does little effect though, as he doesn't seem to be bothered by it at all. Sakura is right, I must practice my intimidating look more.

"Are you an idiot?" He asks, bottomless black eyes staring a competition at me. He pushes himself up, looking at the ajar door before focusing on me again.

"What are you doing here?" he demands, in the cool silky voice.

"I should be the one asking. I live here." The words creep out of my gritted teeth. It takes all my effort to keep myself from flinging a direct punch to his straight sharp nose. I can't help it, he just called me an idiot. And that is the one thing I can't stand people saying. Idiot. As if he is one great person and the world would die without him.

He keeps his quiet and for a moment, I thought I won the match.

"Bullshit, this is my house" he hisses.

This guy must be delusional, I have lived here for almost ten years, and this is the first time I'm seeing him. If this guy thinks he can make a fool out of me, he is sorely mistaken.

"Double bull, this is my house" I sneer loudly, mimicking his stand. His eyes darken in challenge, but he keeps his cool and looks towards the door again.

"What is so interesting about that door?"

"Hn" I don't think that word exist in a dictionary.

"Bastard, I just ask you a question!"

"Shut up"

The nerves of this guy....

"Ah, I see you met Naruto here" an unknown voice comes from the door. Both our eyes dart to the door just as another man with silver hair comes in, carrying two other luggage bags. He wears a patch across his eye like a pirate and has this intimidating smile on his face. Following behind, is none other... than Iruka himself. He stares at me in irritation before gesturing me to help him with the bags.

"I could hear you from ten doors down, you ought to keep your voice softer" he says.

"That's unimportant, who are these people?"

"I'll explain after this, okay?"

---

Okay, so this has become one complete mess. And I had probably just made a fool out of myself. This place does belong to that boy after all. His name, Uchiha Sasuke, an orphan my age that left the country many years back with Kakashi, his teacher. They just came back from the Country of Sound, and it is the first time in ten years that they are back.

Due to the coincidental timing, Kakashi had loaned the place to Iruka before taking off. It makes much sense now, Iruka isn't a wealthy man. He couldn't have own a good apartment by his own. So this is where they killed two birds with one stone, having a sheather for both Iruka and I while at the same time, we could take care of the place.

Still, it is a wonder why Iruka has not told me any of this before. Something this important, he could have at least inform me of their arrival. It does hurt a little to think that Iruka doesn't trust me with this small piece of information.

"We're sorry for the inconvenience, it was not planned for us as well" Kakashi said in between sips of coffee. We are sitting by the dinning table, over a pot of coffee and the sun is almost showing now that it is seven in the morning. The slight drowse I had is now gone with the new found information and caffeine in the system. Not to mention, I have class today.

"How long will you be here this time?" Iruka asks.

"Until the end of the year, at least our little Sasuke here can finish his high school" Kakashi flings an arm to Sasuke's shoulders to only be shrugged out dismissively. He gives an unappreciative grunt while Kakashi just quirk up his lips in a happy smirk. It looks like a usual thing between them, something similar to the bantering Iruka and I share.

I have many questions in my head but I don't feel enthusiastic to voice any out.

"I want my bedroom" Sasuke says, after keeping his silence for so long.

I blink hard again. This is a two bedroom apartment. That means somebody is either sleeping in the living room or... we will be sharing our beds.

"I want my bedroom too" I quickly say, panic rising at the mere thought of losing my room.

"Then, what, we sleep in the living room?" Iruka mocks, pointing to himself and Kakashi. Kakashi chuckles softly at that.

"Not that we haven't done that before" the silver haired man taunts, stirring at the coffee. An eyebrow rises on Sasuke's face, and I mildly wonder how he does that.

"Pervert!"

Kakashi chuckles more.

"Okay, okay, all jokes aside, lets just settle with Iruka and I to this room, and Naruto and Sasuke to that. Okay? Okay, that settles" he says, standing up and walks to the wall with the bags.

_What?_

"That doesn't justify anything at all, what happened to democracy?" I ask, almost too loudly.

"Shut up, idiot, there's no democracy with Kakashi"

"What shut up, you shut up, it's my sleeping place you are talking about."

"Hn"

"What kind of response is that?"

With my bickering, I miss out Kakashi and Iruka slowly transferring their bags into their rooms. And it is already to late to change any of it.

I have to forgo my earlier thought. Life sucks.


End file.
